Here is a partial list, from the Member Orientation Manual entitled, Welcome to the Illuminati: Guiding You to the Light, (c) 2015 Global Illuminati Association, A.G., all rights reserved:
- Three weeks paid vacation for first year employees that can be taken at any time after the end of the sixth month of membership.
- Excellent 401(k) plan with 100% employer matching (for further details, see the Plan Guidelines).
- Stock options in the employee’s choice of the six largest Illuminati-controlled multinational corporations.
- Disability insurance that covers 100% of the employee’s salary in the event of long-term disability.
- Top level health insurance with full optical and dental coverage.
- $2 million life insurance and accidental death policy.
- Access to the Illuminati Members Only health facilities located in every major commercial center around the world.
- Free transportation for company business anywhere in the world, usually on one of the organization’s Gulfstream 550 executive jets.
- Generous expense and clothing allowance.
- Firearms for personal protection, including full automatic weapons irrespective of the laws of the nation in which you are stationed, all provided free of charge, along with a generous supply of combat and carry ammunition, as well as free FBI certified ballistics vest. Appropriate holsters for your carry method of choice are provided, as well as unlimited shooting range time. Heavier weapons, such as mortars, anti-tank rocket launchers, Claymore mines, land mines, Stinger missiles, etc., to be issued on an as needed basis.
- Weekly sweeps of your home and office for listening and other surveillance devices. Additional sweeps as needed.
- Free contract “talent” to remove any person who proves to be excessively inconvenient to your activities. Making the body of the deceased disappear without a trace is included with this service.
- Chauffeur and valet 24/7/365. It is standard Illuminati policy for you to call the chauffeur “Jeeves” and the valet, “Maurice.”
- Cosmetic surgery, forged identity documents, and a fresh cover identity provided free of charge as needed.
- A new Omega Speedmaster or Seamaster wristwatch of your choice every other year. Rolexes are for showoffs.
- Daily shoe shine service.
- Housing provided in Illuminati controlled facility or through a generous housing allowance.
- Companionship that is discrete, suitable, exceptionally attractive matched to your “type,” and the appropriate gender and orientation provided as requested, free of charge.
- Invitations to all the best parties and events, where you will meet and be seen by the world’s elite rulers, movie and television stars, recording artists, and other celebrities. Welcome to the jet set.
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Addendum: I forgot to mention the $750,000 signing bonus.
Email: 666grillnati@gmail.com for details.
Whatsapp number. +256787455792
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